Friday, October 30, 2009

Step away...in the name of love.


There is no way to say this without pissing some people off, so let me just say that if you don't agree with me, I'm totally cool with that. We can still be friends. It's nothing personal.

I can't believe how many people are actually at the R.Kelly concert here in Houston tonight.

No, seriously. I'm real confused by it. Now, I know that he was acquitted of the things he was charged with. But I also saw that tape back in the day. I'm not at all confused about the fact that R.Kelly pissed (among other things) on a little girl and had the unmitigated gall to video tape it. Just as innocent people are sometimes convicted, guilty people sometimes walk free. That's not fair, but that's life as it is today. However, there was a time when even if you made your way free through the justice system, our community held you accountable for your actions. And if you disrespected the women, you most certainly had to pay.

Apparently, that time is over because after a few Come to Jesus songs, R.Kelly's back at the Reliant Stadium. Not a juke joint. Not a small theater. He's playing at the largest venue in Houston and people are shelling out their hard earned dollars to fund the lifestyle and legal fees of a (highly) suspected pedophile. Maybe that's harsh. But it would be one thing if this was just an isolated pissing event. We could call it a mistake. Sick and perverted bad judgment. But it wasn't a one time deal. R. Kelly married an under aged girl and was reportedly involved with other under aged girls as well. This wasn't a mistake. This was a habit. And habits are hard to break.

I'm not at all suggesting that people don't change. But what I am suggesting is that without a catalyst to change, people rarely do. What's the catalyst here? Nothing about R.Kelly's lifestyle or earning capacity seem to be affected by his past indiscretions. As a matter of fact, people are more excited than ever to go see him do what he does. He didn't really suffer at the hands of the law either. So what makes anyone think that there would be a real reason to make a change in behavior?

Listen, you like what you like. I don't really care for his music, but to each his own. My issue is that instead of being outraged that someone who has shown utter disregard for the sanctity of an girl's adolescence and who has used his celebrity to take advantage of a child has breezed into our town to make a few more dollars, we're partying and shit like it doesn't even matter. The only reason it doesn't matter is because that wasn't your sister or your daughter or your niece. Because if it were, you and your boys would have stomped him clean into the devil's lap.

When we adopt the mentality that all of us are apart of one another, the world gets a lot smaller. When I saw that tape, the only thought I had was "That poor child." My heart died a little, because I realized that dude was sick. A grown woman can agree to be pissed on if she wants. Whatever rocks your boat, mama. But a child should never be in that situation. I knew at that point, it was going to very, very, very difficult to ever take him seriously again. I can't shake that image. Time hasn't changed that. We have to forgive. That's universal law; at some point we all need forgiveness. But we don't have to forget and condone. When we do, we say it's okay. And it's not okay. Would it be okay for a grown man to ride around your neighborhood trolling for girls? What I'm saying is that when we say it's ok for an R.Kelly to come riding into town singing "12 Play" when you know good and well he's a likely pedophile, what does that say about how we, as a community, value our girls and women? What does it mean that a girl's dignity was bought for some sneaker money? What does it mean that it came to that point for her so young? What does it mean that people are readily supporting the man who did it?

He can work. Maybe he can write jingles or something. Write songs, he's a gifted writer. Be behind the scenes. But he shouldn't be doing concerts. We shouldn't support that kind of traveling circus. If anyone ever had me on tape messing with a child, my livelihood would be gone - conviction or not. I'd have to find work in another field and that might not afford me the lifestyle I'm accustomed to. I really don't see why that doesn't apply here, especially since working in the field that he works in gives him the advantage - monetarily and influence wise - to perpetrate the offense. Why are we still funding the celebrity that allowed this guy to have the influence he had in the first place? Because he can sing? Lots of people can sing and they don't piss on kids. Pick one and make him a star. But R.Kelly can go work at Burger King for all I care. Sing at the drive through; they have a mic and everything.

Be pissed off all you want. (Maybe Robert will join you, he's into pee.) But realize that when you give your money to him, you're supporting someone who clearly doesn't respect the girls and the women he so readily sings about romancing. Something about that makes me cringe. It makes me certain our priorities are backwards. How about we throw our support behind someone who celebrates women instead?

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